Bye, Bye, Stavros!

“I didn’t get where I am today by writing poems!”

Stavros is tired of life. He is contemplating walking into the sea. 


A      F i n a l      J o u r n e y  ?


“‘Want to do a Reggie Perrin?

Walk into the briny sea?

‘Can’t tell jokes like Neddy Sherrin?

Waves and water set me free!”


Stavros feeling quite unhappy

Missing all his Cyprus chums

Soon be wearing Orville’s nappy?

Ageing bodies, aching tums?


Right beneath the waves he’s plunging

‘Finds a sea-horse for a ride

Straight to Davy’s Locker lunging

‘Got Dear Rufus by his side!


Giant mirror, friends are waving

“Sick of hearing moans and groans!”

Stavros sad and  now he’s raving

“All the walkers on their phones!”


Brian Clough is calmly drinking  (The greatest football manager?)

‘Got the largest, purple nose

Of his latest signing thinking?

Putting on a sober pose?  (Never!)


Stavros waking up, still riding

Sea-horse singing, he’s THE VOICE    (Tom Jones?)

Lennon cringeing, soon he’s hiding

Then.. Just SILENCE, all rejoice!


Freddie Trueman bowling Yorkers

Johnnie Arlott sipping wine   (Claret, of course!)

Crabs and lobsters do….. “New Yorkers”!   (Strictly Come Dancing)

Ashes urn: a cricket shrine!


Rufus, on the beach, is watching

Doesn’t like to feel “All wet”

Rumours of demise he’s scotching

He’ll be back to cheer, I bet!  (“Don’t worry, David P!)


Stavros feeling dizzy, fading

‘Wonder, has he gone for good?

Life without him… quite appalling?

‘Hits the bottom with a thud!    Oh Dear… Will he return a la Sherlock Holmes?  x x x x ‘Hope you enjoyed your diet pills! x x